Sweating the Small Stuff

Many times big problems seem easier to tackle or get through. Maybe it’s that realization that some big things are just so impossible to think about and we instinctively ‘turn it over’ to God.  But what about the small stuff? How often do we sweat it or have a meltdown when little things don’t go right?

I had ‘one of those days’ recently where they were just little things, but things I needed to get done. They weren’t working and everything I tried was just frustrating me to no end.  When I get frustrated to a point where I know I’m about to blow, sometimes in spite of my knowing I shouldn’t- I give into it and do it anyway.

Sometimes I can really identify with Paul when he wrote, “For that which I do I know not: for not what I would, that do I practise; but what I hate, that I do.  But if what I would not, that I do, I consent unto the law that it is good.  So now it is no more I that do it, but sin which dwelleth in me.  For I know that in me, that is, in my flesh, dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me, but to do that which is good is not.  For the good which I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I practise.  But if what I would not, that I do, it is no more I that do it, but sin which dwelleth in me.” Romans 7:15-20

It’s not fun being convicted of our words or actions, but we ought to be grateful God loves us enough to remind us that we’re not that old person anymore and that He expects more of us than our behavior often times says about us.

Almost immediately after my meltdown, I felt ashamed and disgusted with myself. I knew it was not just ridiculous, but wrong and did it anyway.  But being convicted, I spent a lot of time thinking about it and a lot of other things.  Sometimes when we find ourselves in those situations, we feel a little farther away from God than we had before we acted out in sin.  It’s not Him that draws away, but ourselves. It’s a lot easier to think about how sin not only affects our relationship with the Lord and others, but how it separates us (until we repent) from Him and our understanding of Him.

I really hate when these things happen to where the old me shows her ugly little selfish me. I know I am a work in progress and that being forgiven means I’m forgiven for these times too- but it’s hard to handle God’s love in these circumstances sometimes.

I posted a song on lawngren’s article about Love yesterday (if you haven’t read it- you ought to. It’s excellent).  Not only was my mind running over this incident after it happened, but the message at church spoke to me, and coming home this song came on and I heard the lyrics in a whole new way:

I am the thorn in your crown
But You love me anyway
I am the sweat from Your brow
But You love me anyway
I am the nail in Your wrist
But You love me anyway
I am Judas’ kiss
But You love me anyway
See now I am the man who yelled out from the crowd
For Your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking ground
Yes then I turned away with a smile on my face
With this sin in my heart, tried to bury Your grace
And then alone in the night I still call out for You
So ashamed of my life, my life, my life

But you love me anyway….

Unfortunately in our flesh and this life, we’ll have times when we act contrary to who we are in Christ, and while it’s a more painful experience than it was before we were believers, we can be assured that Jesus loves us anyway and is still caring enough to not only show us how we’re wrong in our choices, but that we can do all things in His strength, if only we ask.  Even the small stuff.

This pain is all part of God’s pruning process and as Daisy pointed out when I was discussing the topic of this devotional; He does it “To make the other parts stronger. To put energy to what’s more important, fuel for the right things.”

I’ll agree with her when she said, “Boy that really tweaks my imagination and runs so true to Gods word.”

Thank You Lord for loving us anyway and by Your work in us, you remind us that we are still loved enough to be worked on.

Have a blessed Monday.