Special Red Friday

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance

I am sitting here, listening… no scratch that. I am being overwhelmed by a song…

There are times when words just don’t mean much.  They may be said in all goodness, out of love and caring, and from the heart- but they just seem so lame sometimes.

Yesterday our sweet sister was blindsided by the sudden and totally unexpected loss of her brother.  Loss of loved one is so intense, yet when it’s a parent or older relative or friend, it’s somehow more natural than losing someone so young, whether a sibling, best friend, child…

I have lost more people in the past few years than I ever believed at this time in my life, and yet, my biggest losses have come since being a believer and follower of Jesus.  I’m not sure how folks who don’t believe make it through pain and gut wrenching grief of such a loss, but I know it’s not easy for Christians either.

Faith helps yes, but with a sudden loss, comes so many more questions and emotions that leave one raw and kind of frozen. At least that’s been my own experience.  Sometimes it brings anger and yes, the “WHY”??!!

There’s nothing I can say or no words really that can answer those- those are for God in His wisdom and foresight, and yet sometimes He is quiet on the “Why God?” And that’s the hardest thing for a believer, and even non believers to deal with and get through.

My very first witnessing attempt after being a believer for a few months was when I went to Canada to sort out my crumbling life (long past and now it stays there), and I met an old friend for lunch.  I didn’t know her a whole lot, just through work and a few times out after. She was a sweet girl and I really liked her.  I was kind of taken aback though after talking a bit and I mentioned my faith, and she got very angry.  She had lost her dad to cancer when she was just a little girl, and the pain and unanswered questions left a lot of bitter anger inside. Understandable really, and I couldn’t blame her for it- being a non believer myself for so long, it wasn’t hard to look at things from her point of view.

Going through some really tough things at the time myself though, I had a baby faith and needed to grab hold of it because the alternative just wasn’t an option. Jesus had already proved Himself by saving me physically as well as spiritually, and I had to keep on believing that He has reasons even when we don’t know the “Why”.   I still feel so bad that I had no answers for my friend  back then, and I’m not sure I’d have any even after a 20 year walk with Him.  That beginning walk seems like a million years and miles ago- life has a way of throwing bricks, boulders and sometimes even a small planet right at you…

But for the believer, we know that Jesus sometimes stops more than we realize, and that the ones we do get hit with, are for a purpose and reason beyond our limited minds to know. At least for the time until His plans seem to unfold and we either see, or understand that He does make even the worst of things into something amazing in ways we couldn’t have dreamed of.

Our hearts are heavy for our friend Pf. And hopefully she will know how much we love her and feel the warmth of our Lord as He answers our prayers for comfort and His loving arms to just hold her tight right now- even if she doesn’t want that just now.

I wish there was something we could say or do that would  make everything ok again, but we don’t- so we have to trust the Lord when He knows exactly how she and others are feeling, even in the hardest times.  “Jesus wept.”  He knows and He is there even when we don’t feel Him.

Since today is Friday,  and a melancholy one, I will dedicate this in memory of the four Marines and one Air Force pilot who died this week in service to our country.  My heart felt prayers go out to their families, friends and fellow service members- and God, please, heal the broken hearts, and bless and keep our troops in Your Care.

Thank You Jesus, even when we don’t understand.

I know it’s gaining popularity again with the release of the movie, but this song is just so right, right now- and in a way you’ve never heard it.  My suggestion, sit back, close your eyes and let it wash over you…